Monday, 25 August 2008

Goodbye Tiny Midget. Hello Me.

Sorry that I haven't kept LLTM updated for a couple of months. Perhaps because it was becoming more of a chore then a place to pen down my thoughts. For that reason, I'm moving somewhere else. To take on a more mature turn.

To my readers, whom I've failed, thanks for bothering to read my stuff. I wish you guys a fair journey ahead.

I bid you farewell Tiny Midget. You have served me well.

Sunday, 8 June 2008

Also...

Here are some videos for your entertainment. Found by yours truely, The Catkromancerz.



Then Watch



Then...



Lastly!



Oh and to Daphne. SICK TURTLE PENISES WTFUCK.

AND THE IPOD HUMAN!

SLOTH! OH NOEZ

First of all,
























Say hello to my new friend. Sloth. Hes quite charismatic really. Keeps enthralling me and sooo I keep forgetting to blog. Cute isn't he. :D

Okay now to get serious! Before Vincent the PUREST Heterosexual, left for Indonesia, we went to watch Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull!


Dominic, JT, Vincent and myself, set off for Plaza Singapura to catch Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of Crystal Skull. I was smart enough to get the GV Member Card. Which is free by the way. Two very nice benefits from it.

- Tickets on Tuesdays, cost only $6.50 for everyone that goes with you.

- Secondly, you get a dollar off all combo sets ordered.

The member card is free and the process to get one is simple. Just go sign up at

http://www.gv.com.sg/

Okay the movie now... Was ridiculous for someone like me. Who was watching an Indiana Movie for the first time. I mean why not? Its popular for a reason right? The movie takes place in 1957.

Theres this super magnetic alien body / skull thing that can attract metals from ridiculous distances. Oddly enough, guns belonging to soldiers didn't get pulled away. Secondly, there was a chick there. Why didn't metal from her bra strap fly off?! ( Mind you, its 1957, no advanced or stick on bras back then. )

Then, there was a part where the aliens ran off. Okay... Indiana asks some queer fag. Where'd they go. The fags answer?

They went to the space between spaces. WTFUCK? OKAY. THAT COULD BE ANYWHERE. My first thought was... indecent. And sooo, I'm thinking. WARNING : HIGHLIGHT BELOW AT YOUR OWN RISK. YOU WILL NOT SUE ME FOR THIS IF YOU DO HIGHLIGHT IT KTHX.

I remembered that vaginas were voids. Voids being spaces. Thus, the aliens went to the space between two vaginas aka the spaces. Hehehe, perferted aliens. Now we all know how alien babies come about.

Movie reviews say that there were alot of inside jokes for Indiana fans and the action was decent. Since Its my first time, I wouldn't know shit bout the inside jokes. Secondly, I agree the actions okay but... THE LOGIC IS BROKEN. NO ONE CAN SURVIVE NUCLEAR BLASTS BY HIDING IN FRIDGES. NEITHER ARE ANTS THAT BIG.

Okay, after that Vincent set off for Indonesia. As did Melvito. =( Then, JT and Nick set off for Cambodia. Leaving me and Dominic with alot of free time. Bore fest honestly. However during this period, I got quite alot of crap done. LIKE A NEW LAPTOP HEHEHEHE. VISTA IS PRETTY. Dom's such a pessimist about it Q_Q. I'm bored honestly, Need something to do. Other then gaming really.

I had thoughts of writing a story but, don't quite know what to write about. Sooo, perhaps if someone gave me a theme to write on, I'll come up with something. BTW, Thank Daphne for forcing me to read that silly AAL blog. Ah Lians are a stain to Singapore, yes. But they are, what differenciates us, brighter and less stupid people from the others. So, lets not blog about stupid people because without them, we'd stop looking brilliant. :D

Besides, I can't stand epic bitch fests. Oh yes anyways, after reading that blog, I decided to update as to prevent Daphne from burning her eyes from reading such things. I also loveeee those posters on her blogs. REALLY MOTIVATES ME. SO GIVE ME A THEME TO WRITE ON PLEASE?

PS: I HAVE A WEBCAM NOW. HEHEHE...

Monday, 19 May 2008

Three outings and not one blog post?! Omg.

Rofl, hai. ITS UPDATE TIME! Okay so basically three things to write about. Don't effing blame me if I can't remember lawl.

Lets seeeeeee. Went out on 12th may and watched What Happens in Vegas with Nick, JT, Vincent the PURE HETEROSEXUAL, Jeremykittycat and Melvito.

We dotaed in the morning then went out later. After having arranged to meet with JT, I quickly changed knowing HOW I TAKE FOREVER TO DRESS UP. Which isn't really a guy thing is it? Metro sexual possibly. Speaking about Metro sexuality. I think the word sexuality is in such things to represent the sexiness from such things.

" How sexual. Mrowr!" - The Catkromancerz.

So, I head over to JT's place. Cool and fresh. THE MOMENT I STEP OUT OF THE LOBBY. I BURNEDDDDDD. Damn you weather. DAMN YOU! THE BLISTERING HEAT SEARING MY SKIN AJRGHGHGHG. I trudged on under the scorching sun and eventually reached JT's place. [ Normally, I'm the super...wait uhhh, FASHIONABLY late one. ] Then he makes me wait fourty minutes... Outside his front door.

By the time we reached the bus stop, Melvito and Jeremy were already at Plaza Singapura. What the heck. Since when were TYPICAL teenage guys punctual what more, early. Normally the first and second guy that reaches there are considered punctual... Lolol teenage logic.

So we went to watch What happens in Vegas. Ashton and Cameron pretty interesting if put together.



Pretty damn good movie. The plots pretty obvious though, the humor is great. From my perspective at least. Definitely a show worth the 7.50 or 10 bucks if you're watching on a weekend.

Nick kept saying it was a chick flick. Stuff you watch with your BF/GF or Girlfriends. Like zomg. Its a nice movie k rofl. GV GIVES U FREE IRON MAN TOYS FOR BUYING POPCORN COMBOS. I ripped Iron Man apart with ma clawz. Speaking about popcorn, I basically free loaded off JT and Vincent's popcorn. THANKS.

" Vegas? VEGAS?! Long story, beautiful ending. Heh. - Catkromancerz on Vegas.

Went out for a movie on Saturday with Melvix, Milken, JT and Vincent, we watched Iron Man. Once again, I stole more popcorn rofl. ALL YOUR POPCORN R BELONG TO DA CATKROMANCERZ




Pretty damn good movie. Be sure to catch it this season before its out of the cinemas. A must watch really. After that, we went out for LaN Gaming
. We played Counter Strike and kicked Vincent's ass in Starcraft Brood War. Melvix went off after that though. Then we bugged JT to come over to my place for basketball rofl. On the way we stopped at Vincent's place to get the basketball. I swear the path there twists so much. And ITS DAMN SCARY. We got blackmail material on someone there. Whooowahahhahahahahha.

Sunday.
Gaming... More Gaming. Can't remember rofl.

Monday!
Went out for dinner with Vincent, JT, Nick. Then we headed over to my place for basketball and Milken tagged along. Basically four matches were held and the last one was EPIC.

Me and JT against Nick, Vincent and Milken. We held dominance over the ball till it was 10:6 then, the three, started using the gay triangle formation. And they even the odds. It was 10:10. Nick was going all about beautiful comebacks and Vincent was like " hur hur! Next time we tell this story to your grand children uhhhh. Then they cry hur hur." Then he shoots a three pointer. THE BALL FUCKING SPUN AROUND THE RIM. IT ALMOST WENT IN THEN, Dropped out. I dart towards the ball grab it and pass it over to JT. He darts pass the guys and scores. We WON! Zomg! After that we dotaed till 3 am.

" It was like... a beautiful petunia blossoming! " - The Catkromancerz on their win.






Thursday, 1 May 2008

Okay, this post is longggggggg overdue rofl. Soz. So okay last saturday, the weekend before the exams, we had uh a study group that ended up playing basketball. Heh.

So, I'm dotaing and Vincent the Pure Heterosexual - Vincent asked for a name change. Wtf? - calls me and asks us to study together at my place's library. He comes, Milken comes and JT comes along. After about what felt like 45 minutes of studying for me, we left. Milken went to get his friends, Jordan - my ex school mate - and two other guys whom I have forgotten.

So, while Milken and Vincent went to get their friends, JT and I went to my place and ensued in a Halo Match. Basically I thrash him for two rounds without vehicles and the last round, is tweaked in his favour and I get thrashed. He takes a scorpion tank. I take a Rocket Launcher. By the time I start homing in, I get shredded by shrapnel. FUN YA? Anyhoos I managed to kill him twice.

So after that, we went down for basketball at my place. Since we had seven people, I decided to sit out to even the game.

Then, now the exciting part begins! We went for dinner. As usual, I ate the slowest. I like to play with ma food. Then this little kitty cat comes behind my chair. IT WAS OBVIOUZ HE COULDN'T RESIST THE CALL OF THE CATKROMANCERZ.



"Look at that beautiful fur. So soft. So cute. It's stripped legs. BOW TO ME KITTY!" - Thy Catkromancerz On kitty


"I'm sure all of us can tell this cat is very shy. Look, its avoiding the camera." - Thy Catkromancerz


Vincent the Pure Hetrosexual to my left; Jun.T to my right. Milken to the middle right and Jordan to the furthest left.


CHINESE EXAM REHGHGHGHGHGH. Damn. Scary stuff. Dominic and I, shared the same idea and brought a jacket to school to serve as a pillow. Rofl.

Paper 1 - Compo - Letter writing.
I forgot t3h format GG. Being a geniusssss, I wrote down NI HAO MA which is bound to get me one mark! Hur hur.

Paper 1 - Compo - some stupid question thing.
Being unable to read the facking question, I just copy it down. And that is it. I'm done with Paper 1 in ten minutes. LEET OR LEET?

My cat senses are tingling. The wrath of the chinese teacher shall descend upon thou.
Mrowr!

Monday, 28 April 2008

ZOMGWTF OLD LADEH!

Rofl, sorry. I was supposed to do this post like yesterday but, I didn't because Vincent has yet to send me the pictures of shit that happened on Saturday Night. :D

Woke up. Went to church. Fucked up thing was that, I CAME JUST IN TIME FOR THE EFFING MID YEAR ASSESSMENT FOR CATH CLASS. Of all days I had to come. Basically, it was like a chinese paper except I knew what bullshit I was writing. Rofl I hope I pass. Anyways, for service attachment, I was posted to the Wardens.

ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME NOW? I'D RATHER TEACH AND SMILE AT PEOPLE AND SERVE THEM.

I was telling Sarah that as a warden, I might kill someone with those pole with bags at the end that they use for collecting our money. ( The church doesn't bloody need the donations. They're filthy rich. Honestly. And they still talk about Poverty. Infact, they're so rich, most of us can only dream of having such sums of money in the future. ) Back to where I was. Yes, I might put that thing over someones head and jab him with it. Muwhahahah! Warden of Death. Yes. Nice ring to it.

Now, to begin the real story. Yes. It is a tale of horror, fright and possibly, sadistic humor!

So, I went to eat Aston's express at Bedok. My mum, being a grocery-shoppaholic, decided to leave me, a small little boy alone at the food court. There I was, alone, at the table looking at my measly Crispy Fried Fish.


Food reviews will be done in Orange! Wheee. Okay, the fish tasted great compared to alot of other fish and chips out there. It's very soft and is easy to cut apart ( Unlike those bloody tough fishes that I try so hard to rip apart only to find out it's batter like wtf. SCAMMED ME BEECH. ) Alot of herbs inside. However, after awhile, this tastes abit overpowering. I think its because of the huge portion. Theres a ton of value for money if you are really hungry though.

I paid $5.90 for a large portion of Fish, Tasty Rice ( They really mean tasty ) and Onion Rings ( Very well done as well.) I dare say, far more worth it then any meal at your local fast food restaurant. Give it a try if you happen to past by. However, stop eating if you can't take anymore. Don't force yourself to eat. Thats just stupid. Rofl.

So... this old lady comes up to me and talks to me in... Mandarin. WTF. My reflex action- which I practice alot with teachers. - I start nodding my head like one of those hula dolls. She sits down. WHAT THE HELLLLLLLL. SINCE WHEN DID I AGREE. Zomg. She starts to speak quicker. I panic and in desperation I message my friends on what to do.

The first reply from Miah -
Tell her, Ni Hen Mei, Wo Yao Gen Ni Zuo Ai. Try that. Haha.

I see you find old women pretty and don't mind screwing them... A fetish we didn't know about?

Then, he says lololol, maybe shes Michael Jackson. Later she moonwalk.

Now from Shenzer -

Say " Bu Yao Qi Fu Wo"

WTF DOES THAT MEANNN? - Bert

I have no idea Picked it up from a TV Programme.

WTF. - Bert

Is she Crazy?

Dunno - Bert

Why is she sitting beside you? Try poking her or throw something at her.

Because theres no space! Wtf? - Bert

Give her the stare.

Its rude omg. - Bert

No no, not that stare. The one where you suspiciously stare where you look at her closely and circle around her.

Lololol SMLJ? Since when was there such a stare?

I'm scared. - Bert

Just be calm. Prepare a fork when she strikes. You'll never know when and how she will strike.

Do you know how she'll strike? - Bert

No I don't but I think she'll bite me while I'm eating.

Oh yea, I know I'm juicy.

From my Senior, Rabid Squirrel

Pretend you don't know how to speak chinese and walk away if you haven't ordered or have food on the table and who are you with?

I'm alone and I've ordered. - Bert

Haha, wtf are you doing there then?

Eating... - Bert

Haha, you're sad.

HAHA YOU'RE OH SO HELPFUL!

Last but not least, the god of Nickism.

I beat this UK Guy 1v1 Hes level 18. Lol.

Nice, I'm being owned by an old lady at language skills. - Bert

Lol, cute.

What do I do?!? - Bert

Rape her.

NO COMMENT HERE. And people say I'm twisted.






These were the remains of the old lady's food. Such a beast she was. - Catkromancerz

I ate and departed quickly and went to NTUC. ZOMG NTUC SUCKS NOW K. ONE REASON. THEY LIE.


Such deceitful bastards. To think I love them. Addiction is a pity. - Catkromancer on Coke Zero

COKE ZERO DOES NOT TASTE ANYTHING LIKE COKE. NOT AT ALL. Infact, its just coke light with a new label. Really thats all it is.

DID YOU KNOW ARTIFICIAL SUGAR PROMOTES CANCER? THUS COKE ORIGINAL IS HEALTHIER THEN COKE ZERO / LIGHT.

Then, I saw the most disgusting, most filthy, terrible sight. One that had disheartened me.


" You bastards " - Catkromancerz on the new Coke Shelf.

WHERE DID ALL THE ORIGINAL COKE GO? YOU BASTARDS! Sick sick people.

Well thats about it for Sunday. I'll blog about saturday probably tomorrow when I get t3h picturz from Vincent, Gay Man Extraordinaire.

Toodles!


Wednesday, 23 April 2008

Zomg sorreh

Okai! I'm back after like eleven days. Then again, I didn't go anywhere. :D Rofl okay anyways, first I'd like to begin this with good news!

I HAVE FOUND A WAY PAST THE EMOTICON BLOCK ON MSN! HOORAY. NOW I CAN GIVE YOU PEOPLE :D ON MSN.

Isn't that fabulous news. Make love now! Quickly!

The past week has been nice to me. Spent sometime with my clique. Managed to get Warcraft III installed on Jun.T's PC. HE IS T3H FAIL AT PCZOR! Lololololol. Games were pretty screwed up. Basically it was Me, Nick, Jun.T, Melvix and Jeremy. Melvix went into QQ fest.

Anyways, Its official. I have requested to return back to NA. I hope things go well! :D

I R QQ NOW. My leet planning skills for the BBQ to be on the 23rd of May has been screwed. The Indonesians are going back. This was the conversation with Vincent. [ Hur Hur, Vincent has quite alot of hitters. lololol. His Indonesian girl friends are going to get jealousss.] And on a more serious note, his Indonesian girlfriends are non existent! )

Vincent: Eh Albert, can make the party earlier? Like 15th may like that?
Me : Har? Why?
Vincent : We ( Indonesians ) are going back.
Me : But! Its just like 8 more days! Can't you wait? Its the beginning of our holidays.
Vincent : Don't want lah. Later I see the exam marks then no mood liao.
Me : WTFBBQ!?!?!@!312321 But its Jun.T's Bday and Clan's creation!

That about ends it.
J00( you ) CHOOSE MARKS OVER YOUR CLIQUEEEEE. BASTARDD. RAWR!

I however, will not post-pone the party. LOL QQ MUCH. When better to put a BBQ at the very start of the holidays?

Thy Catkromancer must tend to people now! Toodles. I'll probably edit this later when I get some pictures from Miah. Kbai!